As A Man Thinketh

As a Man Thinketh

Text: Proverbs 23:7

I have been doing some thinking about my thinking lately (that's called meta-cognition), and I have come to realize how critical having clear thinking helps us in our relationships.  Even more than that, unclear (aka stinkin) thinking keeps us trapped in our former wounds, created in our families of origin, and keeps us away from the destiny that God has granted us in Christ.

For years, psychoneurologists have been telling us to think of brain functions in terms of left and right, with the left hemisphere taking on the functions of logic, linear thinking, and the right hemisphere responsible for artistic, creative, beautiful non-linear, free-flowing  intuitive, thoughtful, and subjective thinking.

Now, scientists are considering the virtue of viewing the brain in terms of upper-lower, with the upper brain, the cortex responsible for higher-order cognition: altruism, compassion, and lower brain (or lizard brain) 

The lizard brain is more primitive, and is where fear, rage, and doubt come from.

Or as Steven Pressfield describes it, the resistance. The resistance is the voice in the back of our head telling us to back off, be careful, go slow, compromise. The resistance is writer's block and putting jitters and every project that ever shipped late because people couldn't stay on the same page long enough to get something out the door.

The resistance grows in strength as we get closer to shipping, as we get closer to an insight, as we get closer to the truth of what we really want. That's because the lizard hates change and achievement and risk.

The lizard is a physical part of your brain, the pre-historic lump near the brain stem that is responsible for fear and rage and reproductive drive. Why did the chicken cross the road? Because her lizard brain told her to.

Technically, the lizard brain is called the amygdala.  It's where we rehearse emotional experiences before they are uploaded into long-term storage.  Your brain’s amygdala is responsible for declarative memory, or facts that can be recalled. The more emotionally charged an event, the more the amygdala is activated. That’s why we remember more about negative events than we do about neutral or even positive ones.

Your brain is hard wired to react more so to negative events than positive ones. Here are just some of the ways:

• Negative events or failures cause us to self-evaluate and search for meaning.
• We remember an individual’s negative traits much more than their positive ones.
• Your brain devotes more time and attention to negative stimulus
• People remember the negative word choices we use to describe ourselves, much more so than anypositive attributes we list.
• Acceptance by our peers does not affect self-esteem but rejection sure does.

Thinking of Lazarus: Jesus wept with compassion when he saw Lazarus' tomb, but did not get stuck in his emotions over Lazarus' passing, but called him out with the power of God.  When Lazarus was raised, he needed to be unbound, so Jesus said, "Loose him and let him go!"

Our thoughts can bind us to realities that are already dealt with by the finished work of Christ OR need to be loosed via a sanctification experience with the Holy Spirit.

Ideally we are called to sober judgement, and to live in balance (Romans 12:3)

• Right thinking
• Right believing
• Right feeling
• Right doing

As you see from the list above, thinking leads to behavior.  The Teacher, Solomon, reminds us of this:

Here are a few examples from Proverbs:

"Do not eat the bread of a miser,

Nor desire his delicacies;

For as thinks in his heart, so is he.

'Eat and drink,' he says to you,

But his heart is not with you.

The morsel you have eaten, you will

vomit up,

And waste your pleasant words."

(Proverbs 23:6-8, emphasis on 7)

In this case, the heart intention of the miser is warped, and does not match what he is saying to the Teacher, writing in the role of guest.   Warped truth is called wickedness in the Bible.  Wickedness is distorted thinking.

Here is another nugget from Proverbs:

"Through wisdom a house is built,

And by understanding it is established;

By knowledge the rooms are filled

With all precious and pleasant riches."

(Proverbs 24:3-4)

Wisdom may be the walls and roof of the house, and knowledge the furniture and art, but understanding is the foundation of our life.  From this passage, we can see that knowledge is wisdom that becomes a foundation for life through understanding.  You cannot apply wisdom (applied wisdom is knowledge), if you do not understand it.  The Ethiopian official was reading Isaiah, a passage about the coming of Jesus, when Philip appeared beside the official's chariot.  Philip asked, "Do you understand what you are reading?"  The official replies, "How can I understand unless someone explains it to me?"  You see, the official was seeking understanding from Philip.

Wisdom is knowledge that passes through the womb of understanding.  "In all your getting, get understanding." (Proverbs 4:7)

Right believing

Basically, this is about doctrine.  Orthodox believing is required to be balance.  Creation, Sin, Fall, Redemption. 

These are the basics to believe properly.  

Right feeling

If we were honest, emotions run the ship.  "I don't feel like it" is a very popular phrase.  Actions do not come from feelings; they are modified by feelings.

Remember the illustration about waking up for work, and it's 16 degrees outside.  In the center of your being, there is your heart/will.  Soul (intellect, emotions, feelings) modify your heart, and your actions.

The alarm goes off, and the weatherman says it's 16 degrees.  

Your body is nice and warm under the covers, even your little toe wants to go deeper in after getting a chill.

Your feelings say, "I am nice and toasty under here."

Your thoughts say, "I sure wish I didn't have to get up.  Maybe five more minutes. I am not even appreciated at this job."

Your social context says, "My girlfriend is skipping work anyway."

Your final action......you call off work.

For the Spirit-controlled temperament in the same situation, all the conditions are the same, EXCEPT for the thinking.  The distorted thinking is replaced with the Word of God; in this case: "If a man does not work, he does not eat." (2 Thessalonians 3:10)

Final action....covers come off, getting ready for work.

Right thinking (Adapted from Burns, David B., Feeling Good.  (For more resources, see)

How we think either helps us or hurts us in relationships.  In order to get to understand where your thinking is at, you may need to take a look at these common distortions that warp our thinking.  Remembering that thinking is behavior, understanding how we think now can help us to change it.  So here are some common thought distortions.

1 - All or Nothing Thinking:

Living out of fear of making mistakes, "Mistakes make me a loser."  Perfectionism tendencies.

(Remedy: All of us have places where we grow and change, mistakes are how people learn.)

2 - Overgeneraliztion:

One event or thing that happens is thought of as occurring over and over. A never-ending pattern.  "It always happens to me."  ("Whenever I sit at the dinner table, my knee always finds a table leg.")  Pain of rejection comes from overgeneralization, because the over and over occurring indicates proof that the universe can't stand you.

3 - Mental Filter:

You pick out a single negative detail and dwell on it exclusively, so that your vision of all reality becomes darkened, like a drop of ink that discolors a whole beaker of water.  (This donut is defective, it has a hole in it.)

4 - Disqualifying the Positive:

The persistent tendency transform neutral or positive experiences into negative ones.  Positive experiences just don't count.  (You get a compliment about your dress, and you reply, "Oh this old rag?)

5 - Jumping to Conclusions:

You make a negative interpretation even though there are no definite facts to support your conclusion.  

Two types:

a - mind reading: Imagined reactions: partial data, filled in with self-invented junk. Sets itself up as a self-fulfilling prophecy.

b- the fortune teller error: You anticipate that things will turn out badly, and you feel convinced that your prediction is an already established fact. ("This house is going to make me sick" The lady of house gets sick)

6 - Magnification and Minimization:

a - blowing things out of proportion, everything is a catastrophe. You exaggerate the importance of things.

b - You inappropriately shrink things until they disappear, making them unimportant.

(Example of the speck in your brother's eye, while a log is in your own: The speck loomed large, while the log was deemed unimportant.)

7 - Emotional Reasoning:

You assume that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things are.  (I feel it, therefore it must be true.)

Feelings are the only descriptor of your state of being (I am mad at you, therefore you hate me.).

[Projective Identification]

8 - "Should" statements:

You try to motivate yourself with "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts" as if you had to be whipped and punished before you could be expected to do anything.  "Musts" and "oughts" are also offenders.  The emotional consequences are self-loathing, guilt and shame.  Guilt says "I did wrong."  Shame says, "I am wrong."  Creates bitterness and self-righteousness.  When you direct "should" statements toward others, you feel anger, frustration and resentment. ("Good" Christians LOVE this one!)

9 - Labeling and Mislabeling

This is an extreme form of Overgeneralization.  Instead of describing your error in behavioral terms, you attach a label on yourself ("I'm such a loser.")  One point of behavior describes your entire character.  When someone else's behavior rubs you the wrong way, you attach a negative label (He's an idiot - road rage.)  Mislabeling is in play when you describe an event with language that is highly colorful and emotionally loaded.

10 - Personalization

You see yourself as the cause of some negative external event which you did not involve you, but you think you are personally responsible.  (Simple illustration: person drops a book, you say "I'm sorry.")  Assuming responsibility for a negative event when there is no basis for doing so. Influence is confused for control.  (This happens often to people with a high degree of mercy and empathy for others; we are responsible to people, not for them.)

When you can identify your favorite (pet) cognitive distortion(s), you can make a specific confession to God, cast your burdens, and get over it.  However you also need to repent (metanoia - change your mind), and practice the positive behavior, which can be found in Romans 12:1-3

12 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. 2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

Serve God with Spiritual Gifts

3 For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.

 

First, present your bodies as a living sacrifice.  Paul is using the word that describes the OT burnt offering, one that is completely consumed by fire.  Bringing our entire lives to Jesus, who baptizes us with the Holy Spirit and fire to completely cleanse us.

Second, do not conform to the world, but be transformed by the renewing of mind.  The word transformed here is the same word used to describe the Transfiguration of Jesus. (e.g., Luke 9:28-36).  "Transfigured" means to be endowed with glory; Jesus, Moses and Elijah shone with a great light. "Renewing of mind" is a continual makeover of mind by the Word of God.  Simply put, your life gets brighter as you daily replace distorted thinking with the ways that God thinks of you in the Word.

Third, view yourself with sober judgement. God gives us the power to do through the Word.  This exhortation applies to "every one" because each person is given spiritual gifts to use in the work of God; thus, it is necessary that each person examines himself "with sober judgment" in order to determine the gifts and the level of service God desires for his life. Also, this exhortation applies to "every one" because we all tend to have an incorrect view of ourselves; thus, it is necessary that each person examines himself "with sober judgment" in order to get a correct view of himself. Either we view ourselves too modestly, so that do not live up to our potential; or we view ourselves too proudly, so that we see ourselves as having gifts that we do not have. You don't want to keep the grave clothes, do you?

You see how having distorted thinking can keep you from living the full potential of God's destiny for your life?

Living below the level of faith God has given you could lead you to file Chapter 7 on life, leaving you spiritually bereft, existing barely on the dashed dreams of a hope deferred.  Jesus paid for this gift of faith you have, cash in on it. Change your thinking, change your life.

 

Key Quote:

"If you are distressed by anything external,

the pain is not due to the thing itself,

but the estimate of it,

and this you have the power of revoking

at any time."

--Marcus Aurelius